Coughing And Bleeding

When I saw Patrick's stained fingers, I observed closely it was blood. I assumed the stain came from his ears again. I observed - no wound. I checked on his arms and legs. No wounds as well. I was puzzled where the stain came from. Then I had a sudden thought - check his diapers.

When I saw the bloodstain on the diapers, I panicked and called my husband to come upstairs quickly. 

When he reached the room, I told him Patrick is bleeding.

"where?", he asked


I pointed to his diapers and then his anus stained blood. 

Patrick's blood stain on his diapers.
It had never happened like this before. Usually there were droplets of blood together with his stools. Even that rarely happened. 

"Is it starting?", my worried thoughts came. When I glanced towards my husband's face, he too have similar thoughts. 

"It" refer to liver damage.

My husband advised me to clean up his anus. After the blood stain was cleaned, my husband took a closer look. 

"There is a cut near the anus hole."

I gave a sigh of relief. 

Before this heart stopping experience, Patrick had been fussing on occasion especially after he coughed. He had been coughing since his last doctor appointment. Whenever he coughed, he would get agitated and sometimes he cry out of frustration. When the coughing became too strong, it caused him to vomit as well. 

Last night was a restless night for us both. He would sometimes woke up from sleep due to his cough. Twice he vomited because of his cough.

I would check his body temperature now and then to ensure he does not have fever. And if he do have fever, to ensure it did not go beyond two days. Otherwise he need to be hospitalised for monitoring. Because his fever may not be just a normal fever but an indication of cholangitis, a bacterial infection of the intestines. The symptoms would be fever, acholic stools and positive blood cultures. Since his diagnosis of Biliary Atresia (BA) in 2017, he has yet to develop that symptom.

This is my life today - monitoring of Patrick, to see whether he has newer symptoms.  Occasionally it gave rise to panic like today's experience. There were moments my husband had to be a voice of common sense, which is to investigate the source instead of jumping to conclusions. At times I have to be the one to offer that when my husband got too worried himself. 

This experience is teaching me not to panic first. I am to remember to breathe first before giving in to panic and worries. To be present of each moment. Investigate the source. Then take the next best course of action for Patrick. 

Remember to breathe during sudden changes of Patrick's symptoms


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